Beautiful Disaster
by Aldara Gaea
Summary: Hermione is sick of waiting... why won't Ron just admit his true feelings about her? She knows that he's naturally awkward, but he didn't seem to have trouble with all that last year with Lavender. Will he come around? Written before HP7 of course.


**So, this is the other H/R fic I was talking about. In a way, I like it better – it's a little bit more in character… and I wrote it later, so my technique isn't so immature. Anyway, please read and review… and please feel free to criticise and even suggest subjects to write about: if there's a character who's point of view you'd like to hear, I'm more than happy to oblige.**

_**Lyrics are Kelly Clarkson's "Beautiful Disaster"**_** (gorgeous song btw, you really gotta hear it if you haven't) and the characters are the creations of JK Rowling.**

**Beautiful Disaster**

Hermione crept up the rickety stairs, treading carefully so as not to wake everyone. It was late and she had just arrived at The Burrow, to be welcomed by a tired Mrs. Weasley, who was waiting up for her husband's arrival. The floor boards creaked mournfully beneath her and Hermione stood still, making sure she'd not aroused anyone.

Finally, she reached Ginny's landing and she eased the door open as quietly as she could. There was a bed, neatly made and ready for Hermione to climb into, which she did gratefully after donning her pyjamas.

_**He drowns in his dreams  
An exquisite extreme I know  
**_

The sunlight shone through the open window and Hermione groaned pulling the covers over her firmly shut eyes. She could hear Ginny walking around the room quietly, trying not to disturb her, and finally the sound of the squeaky door opening and closing. The sound of voices came from the landing outside and Hermione recognized Ron's voice. Her stomach jumped she took a couple of deep breaths to try and keep her heart rate normal.

All went silent and Hermione sighed. She remained still, on her side now fully awake and heard to creak of a floorboard outside the door. Hermione grinned to herself but remained still.

_**He's as damned as he seems  
And more heaven than a heart could hold**_

The door slowly creaked open and Hermione could imagine Ron's freckly red haired head looking in cautiously, checking that she was still asleep. She closed her eyes and could sense him move into the room, and felt him sit gingerly on the edge of her bed.

Carefully she rolled over, as if waking up and yawned. She felt Ron's body stiffen and she grinned inside while slowly opening her eyes. Ron had obviously been staring at her because when she looked up at him, his ears went red.

"Goo-good morning 'Moine,"

_**And if I try to save him  
My whole world could cave in  
It just ain't right  
It just ain't right**_

Hermione smiled and sat up slowly. She was wearing a tight pale blue singlet top and she could tell that Ron was trying hard not to stare.

"Good morning Ron," she said brightly and stared at him.

His good-natured face was still a little sleepy and his bright red hair ruffled. Hermione loved everything about him, and she felt like she should say so. She opened her mouth to speak but Ron started first.

"Hermione? C-can I ask you something?" he said tentatively.

_**Oh and I don't know  
I don't know what is after  
But he's so beautiful  
Such a beautiful disaster**_

Hermione smiled and nodded, staring at him expectantly. Ron's ears glowed red as his hair and he hesitated.

"I… I just need to ask…" he trailed off weakly and stared down at the bedspread, "if… if you wanted to go down to breakfast yet."

Hermione's heart stopped in disappointment and she nearly cried. But she held back the sob and nodded her head bleakly. He stood up from her bed, allowing her to get up, and started to the door in silence. She sat a moment in the bed and groaned with irritation. Ron turned around to see what was wrong, but she just shrugged and got up.

_**And if I could hold on  
Through the tears and the laughter  
Would it be beautiful?  
Or just a beautiful disaster**_

Mutely she followed him downstairs and thoughts swirled around Hermione's head. They received warm greetings as they stepped into the Weasley's kitchen and Hermione sat down next to Harry with a mock cheery 'Good morning everyone'.

Gratefully she dug into the plate of eggs, bacon and sausages that Mrs. Weasley set down for her and she ate thoughtfully, still glancing at Ron every so often.

"How was your sleep, Hermione dear?" asked Mrs. Weasley cheerfully as she finally sat down to her own food. "You got here awful late last night!"

Hermione smiled. "Yes, I came on the Knight Bus this time, Mum and Dad have to work today, and there were lots of stops before here."

Mrs. Weasley smiled genially and seemed to sense that Hermione didn't feel like chatting so she turned to talk to her husband instead. Hermione smiled appreciatively as this left her free to think about Ron.

_**He's magic and myth  
As strong as what I believe**_

Hermione resumed her examination of Ron over the pitcher of pumpkin juice. His eyebrows were knotted in irritation and he responded to Harry's efforts at conversation tersely and with little thought. Harry looked at Hermione with an expression that asked what's-the-matter-with-him? Hermione shrugged and Harry sighed loudly.

"I don't know what's up with you two," he said only loud enough for only them to hear, "but I hope you get over it soon." Then he turned his attention to Ginny.

Ron looked furtively at Hermione, and she looked quickly away with a small blush. But neither said a word and the silence was like a knife in Hermione's heart.

_**A tragedy with  
More damage than a soul should see**_

Hermione sighed and finished her breakfast before standing.

"That was lovely Mrs. Weasley," she said with forced brightness. "Could I have a shower?"

Mrs. Weasley smiled and nodded.

"Ginny dear, why don't you run along and get Hermione a fresh towel?" she said.

Ginny got up happily and motioned for Hermione to follow her. As soon as they reached the stairs Ginny broke out with a hundred questions, all at once, and Hermione's head reeled.

"Hang on, Ginny, one at a time!" she half shouted to be heard. Ginny grinned.

"Sorry Hermione, but what happened between you and Ron?"

Hermione sighed, and was still trying to think of the answer when they reached Ginny's room.

"He came in, and I thought he was going to tell me he likes me… but he ended up just asking if I was coming to breakfast."

_**And do I try to change him?  
So hard not to blame him  
Hold on tight  
Hold on tight**_

For her friend's sake, Ginny tried hard not to laugh… and failed rather miserably.

"I'm sorry Hermione," she giggled, "but it's just like him… to lose the plot like that!"

Hermione sighed again.

"I know, I just don't understand him! It's so difficult sometimes Ginny," she dropped down onto the bed with a groan. "What do I do?"

Ginny grimaced and sat next to her.

"Look, Ron's my brother… I know how frustrating he can be. You just need to be patient – he'll come around!" she laid her hand on Hermione's arm. "Just give him time."

_**Oh 'cause I don't know  
I don't know what is after  
But he's so beautiful  
Such a beautiful disaster**_

Hermione nodded, tears sprouting. Four years had passed since Hermione had realized she liked Ron as more than a friend. At first she had tried to deny it. She'd fought within herself, and with him, for over a year before she had finally accepted the inevitable – she couldn't get Ronald Weasley out of her head.

And he seemed to consume her every thought now. She couldn't wake up in the morning without wondering what Ron was doing at that moment couldn't even look at anything related to magic without a memory of the two of them at Hogwarts. It was even becoming a little annoying, but it looked like he was permanently stuck there.

"Are you ok Hermione?" Ginny's gentle voice broke Hermione's train of thought.

Hermione shook her head and smile vaguely.

"Oh… yeah I'm fine Ginny," she looked at her friend, "I'll see you down there in a bit."

Ginny nodded slowly and left the room.

_**And if I could hold on  
Through the tears and the laughter  
Would it be beautiful?  
Or just a beautiful disaster**_

Hermione stood in the steaming hot shower and imagined the water washing away her worries. Her head seemed so crowded, but there was only one thing there – Ron. She thought of his smiling freckled face, how she had bawled her eyes out almost every night last year. Just the thought of him with someone else made her jumpy, but seeing him sit in the middle of the common room with _her _had been unbearable!

It wasn't like either had ever said how they felt, she thought as she stepped out of the shower. In her mind, she had done everything possible to let him know what she felt, without saying it outright that is.

"But no," she muttered to herself, "I just had to fall for the thickest headed dolt that ever lived!"

She vented a little of her frustration on her legs as the towelled them dry. _No more hiding_, she thought, _next opportunity I get I'll make sure he knows exactly what I think._

_**I'm longing for love and the logical  
But he's only happy hysterical  
I'm waiting for some kind of miracle  
Waited so long  
So long**_

When she stepped out of the bathroom, drying her hair as she walked, she again came face to face with Ron. He was on his way up to his room to get changed and was still in his paisley pyjamas, which were again an inch too short in arm and leg, and she noticed that the top half of the buttons were open. A small smile spread over her face as she registered his toned chest muscles, which had been refined by his recently joining the Quidditch team.

"Hi 'Mione," he said, "nice shower?"

Hermione grinned and almost laughed, but held it back and only nodded.

"Yeah, it was just what I needed," she replied.

He nodded and continued up the stairs, his eyebrows again knitted in serious thought. Hermione sighed and made her way to Ginny's room to tidy her bed and belongings.

"Maybe he's just not right for me," she said to herself and looked in Ginny's mirror. A resolute, dark haired girl looked back at her with disappointed hazel eyes. She pulled her hair back and tied into a knot at the back of her neck.

"He never takes anything seriously," she said aloud, "what's to make me think he'll be any different with me?" Then she shook her head. "But I guess I can't give up on him yet."

_**He's soft to the touch  
But frayed at the end he breaks  
He's never enough  
And still he's more than I can take**_

The rest of the day, Ron had almost avoided her, but after dinner found Harry, Hermione and Ron in the living room together. The boys were playing wizard chess on the floor and Hermione was stretched out on the couch behind Ron reading an old book from his mother's book case.

When Ron won his fifth game, Harry yawned loudly.

"I give up!" he said as he stood slowly, "I'm going up to bed."

Hermione didn't even look up from her book as he left the room.

"See you in the morning Harry," she said to him.

The room was left in silence and Hermione hardly noticed that Ron was still in the room until he spoke again.

"Hermione," he said tentatively.

She glanced away from her book. He had turned so he was sitting to face her and his eyes were again thoughtful, an expression he had donned a lot throughout the day.

"What is it Ron?" she asked, looking for her bookmark. Ron shifted uneasily.

_**Oh 'cause I don't know  
I don't know what is after  
But he's so beautiful  
Such a beautiful disaster  
And if I could hold on  
Through the tears and the laughter  
Would it be beautiful?  
Or just a beautiful disaster**_

Hermione smiled sadly.

"If you have something to say to me, just say it," she told him, "no point in prolonging the agony."

He grinned sheepishly and looked into her eyes.

"'Mione… I - I like you," he paused then added, "a lot."

Hermione giggled.

"Is that all it was?" she asked with a big grin. Ron just looked at her.

She sat up and dropped from the couch onto the floor beside him. His eyes never left her face and she blushed.

"Don't look at me like that," she said.

He shook his head dazedly, his face disconcerted.

"What do you mean 'is that all'?" he asked.

Hermione giggled and took his hand. For a while she just sat there, fiddling with his fingers; delighting in the tingling sensation that ran up her arm from each point of contact with his skin.

"Because I like you too Ron," she said softly, "and I've been waiting so long for you to just say it too."

_**He's beautiful  
Such a beautiful disaster**_

Again he just sat there like a gold fish: eyes bugged and mouth hanging half open.

"That look really doesn't become you Ron," she pointed out gently.

He blinked slowly. Hermione leant toward him.

"Aren't you forgetting something?" she whispered.

"Um…" Ron's eyes flickered to her lips, "I dunno, am I?"

Hermione leant closer again.

"I suppose that depends on how much you like me."

"Oh, there's no doubt about that," he assured her quietly.

"Then you better remember what you forgot before…" her barely audible reply was cut off when their lips finally touched.

They kissed tentatively at first; both exploring the feeling of the other's mouth on their own. But soon it grew more passionate, and Hermione felt herself melting into his body. Ron slowly let his hand slide around to the small of her back, pulling her closer and she snaked her hands up around his neck.

Hermione felt that she could almost thank Lavender for educating Ron so thoroughly last year - the guy kissed like a god. She groaned as he slowly disengaged himself from her and she tried to pull his lips back onto hers. Ron just smiled and kissed her eyes, which she had unknowingly closed.

_[Fading__  
__**Beautiful  
(Beautiful disaster)  
Beautiful disaster**_

"Was there anything else I missed?" he asked softly.

Hermione opened her eyes and stared into the green depths of his. She shook her head bemusedly.

"Good," Ron said with a satisfied smile, "because I'm quite happy to discuss this bit for quite a while longer."


End file.
